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But a World Lives in You

Monday, August 26, 2013

I was homesick this weekend.


It happened in the strangest way--right alongside feeling like I'm more at home here than I have been in the past month. There's one lone box of clothes to be hung up in a corner of our bedroom, and everything else is more or less in its place. All of my books are here. I've cooked countless meals in the kitchen already. Every morning, I wake up beside the man I'm going to marry in less than nine months and he goes to work and every evening he comes home and we have dinner. And yet, I have parents and a brother and a sweet old dog in Virginia, and when I talk about them, they are always "back home."

I'm now trying to accept the fact that it's okay to be happy and sad at the same time--to love it so much here and miss my family and friends and mountains so dearly. Life is rich and complicated, and the shiny vacation feeling of a new place and new furniture and a farmers' market every Saturday might be rubbing off a bit, but real life is just as beautiful.

"You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you."
--Frederick Buechner

17 comments:

  1. I feel ya. I love living abroad, but some days I'd rather be in my parents house watching TV shows with them. It's normal, and it is DEFINITELY ok to love where you're at and miss where you've come from.

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  2. Love the quote!
    Every time I leave home it's like I was 15 going to boarding school for the first time. Happy sad happy sad. Look at the pretty.

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  3. It's certainly brave to move away from family; I know family was a large contributing factor to us staying put, despite the dwindling job opportunities in our area. And despite Joe's family only being an hour's drive away, he still finds himself getting homesick, 12 years after moving away.

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    1. It's always hard! At least you guys can visit whenever you want!

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  4. I also grew up in the mountains of SWVA and I STILL refer to it as "back home," even though I haven't technically been living there since I graduated college 5 years ago. It does get better, but I can tell you that, so far, that feeling of homesickness never really leaves you--which is why that quote is so appropriate!

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  5. It'll get easier. I promise. *lots of hugs*

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  6. Love that quote. And I feel ya...we just moved to a new town ourselves and part of me still feels like we are on vacation rather than being 'home.'

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  7. Hmm.. it does get better, or easier. The good thing is, you know it's not permanent, and you can look at it as an adventure. It's also awesome to have the wedding to plan and lots of reasons to see everyone you love all year.

    Phone calls helped me a lot, and face timing my sister while we cook is an all time favorite thing to do!

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  8. So true!!! I can't wait to hear more once you're on the other side...You know, the side where you are home and so what if everyone you love isn't there, you're too busy to really dwell on it anymore. Wait do we actually EVER get there? Each time I've moved, eventually I've always ended up right back near the majority of my family. Then, once I'm "back", I'm sooo afraid to leave again! I guess I just need to remember that everything always works out!

    Is that quote from a book? I absolutely love it - I want to read more by that guy!

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  9. "Home" is the most confusing word. Because I talk about going back home for Christmas or that my mom is at home or anything like that, but then I'm like, well I mean home home. New York home. It's all part of this confusing phase of growing up I think.

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  10. I totally understand this feeling, and absolutely love that quote :) As complicated as it is, it's so true that you can feel happy and sad all at once...I am loving living in Portland, but I still miss my family and friends in Michigan SO much. But all you can do is focus on the good and know that you are exactly where you're supposed to be :)

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  11. Sometimes homesick happens to the people who are left behind. Because the person who moved took a piece of your heart with them, and your world isn't quite home any more either. I still feel "homesick" for the moments that happen each day that used to include my daughter. Moving away is very brave, and you will be great!

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  12. Oh I love that quote at the end! Such a great way to think about things and put it all in perspective!! I know that I certainly get homesick from time to time and I still call "back home" where my parents use to live and not even where they live now... I guess its a habit and that will always be "home" to me even though that's not where everyone I love is

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  13. Aww. This is definitely a natural thing and it's good that you're recognizing your feelings. For some people, home is always going to be that other place. As long as you can recognize all of the amazing things about where you live now, too.

    The Rambling Fangirl

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  14. I think this is why I can't imagine living anywhere else in the States besides DC. homesickness makes sense across an ocean but it's confusing when, all things being relative, you're not that far away, you know? it's normal and understandable but it doesn't make sense when we try to rationalize it.

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